Saturday, April 4, 2009

It all makes sense now

I know I don't usually write about things I'm about to write here, but this time, it was so necessary and couldn't be avoided. This was never intended to be a blog focused solely on my children or family life, but about things going on in my head that were appropriate enough to post and not too personal. Today, finally, is one of those days where I get to blog about something that's been on my mind that I have found to be an interesting realization. It's funny how now that I am about to turn 30, I have been trying to figure out what path I will take in my life and what kind of person I really want to be. I'm feeling philosophical all of a sudden. Maybe I am finally maturing. Or maybe I just "think" I need to feel more grown-up since 30 is that age where it's really about being more of an adult for REAL. ANyway...onto the recent-but-not-really-so recent-realization...more like something I knew all along and recent events have "sealed the deal."

First of all, I have to say that Facebook has become this new "buzz" of gossip for me because I am connecting with all of my old friends from high school. It's crazy to catch up with people I haven't seen or heard from in years and feel like I know all about them know based on what they're posting on the forum or by looking at their photos on their profiles. It does make me feel re-connected to them b/c some of them were really good friends of mine in high school and I enjoy keeping up with them. But, as I continue to "find" people or they find me, I have been discovering that some of my friends have changed and grown up, while others are still the SAME and have not changed one bit.

Thus, EXAMPLE A:

You know how when something happens and you're in that moment and you think, "Why is this happening to me?" or "What did I do to deserve this?" Or, you think that something happens that is so tragic (especially when you were in high school) and you think your world is ending? Well, I remember feeling that way when I was 16 and my boyfriend at the time broke up with me on my freaking birthday. That sucked for many reasons I won't go into on this blog. But, I totally realized something again today. Of course after I moved on from that "tragic" event, (which took like a year, mind you) I knew it was for the best. We really stopped talking for many years until we became "friends" on Facebook. That thought I described earlier continued to come full circle each time I sign in on Facebook and read his asinine comments. Now I realize everyone is entitled to their own opinions, but this guy used to try and convince me that it was okay to use the "N" word, but only for certain people. WHAT? Seriously? (I bet if you asked him even today as a 30-year-old, he would still own that comment and still debate that was, indeed true) (I know...ridiculous and totally inappropriate and wrong on so many levels.)

And then I read his comments about what he thinks about Obama and calls him some terrible names, which isn't the worst part. The worst part is, he's making these horrible comments publicly AND he's in the military right now overseas in Iraq. That to me, is not okay. I understand if you have personal or political views, but to publicly put those out on FB as part of the armed forces? That is probably not the best thing to do in my opinion...Velo--can you speak to that? And now finally, after he writes on FB today and makes 2 comments about how Iowa is all "jacked up" because the Supreme Court ruled it was unconstitutional to not allow Same Sex Marriage by calling the Iowa Governor a dumba&& and then sending a message to his wife saying it was time to move out of state. Don't get me wrong, and I'll state this again: I think people are entitled to their own opinions, but he makes comments that are so far from the truth and based on no facts whatsoever. Seriously, this guy is more ignorant than I ever thought possible.

This was just another sign that God, indeed DOES have a plan for all of us and that things have a way of working out for the best. If I ran into him anywhere nowadays, I would SO give him a piece of my mind which was something I never would have done 14 years ago. And believe me, after I finished with him, it would probably cause him to call me many awful names, delete me as a friend from his FB account and never want to talk to me again. However, in all reality, it would probably be a waste of my breath to say two words to him about this, because I know it wouldn't change his mind. And I am not going to go out of my way just to confront him on this. Honestly, I'm sure that he is probably a good person. It's just sometimes things bother me and this was one of those times. So, for now, I'll just rant on this blog instead.

The final question to all of you is this: Have you ever had this realization where you discovered (even though you knew all along but it finally made REAL sense) that something was meant to be and really, it was the best thing that could have happened to you (at the time)? If so, I want to hear your story. :)

5 comments:

Briana said...

At the risk of sounding exactly like my mother...everything happens for a reason, and I truly believe that. I'm so with you on how some people just have not changed AT ALL! And for that reason I've denied lots of FB friend requests. I mean, are we really obligated to accept just because we were once friends with the person? I certainly don't think so. And some may look at it as if I'm being a snob, but I've moved on and they haven't and there's just no place for them in my life.

abby said...

I totally agree w/ you and Briana - my dad always said the same thing as Briana's mom. And it is so true. I would totally delete that jackhole from your friends - don't be afraid to do it, you do not have to read that crap!

Tyler-Ashlee's Mommy said...

I'm with everyone on here and your post. Things happen for a reason. I remember being devestated that Ryan spent six months of our multi-year relationship cheating on me (this was in college) and then he was to marry the girl and she died right before their wedding. Weird things happen and you can't explain them!

April said...

Short answer - YES, this guy can get into serious trouble for saying what he is on FB. We all know who I said I was voting for when we were at Meegs... more people obviously felt different. By being in the military Obama is our BOSS. Respect is one of the cornerstones of our organization. Regardless of whether he likes the president or not, it is unlawful (military law) for him to make the comments I'm assuming he's making. I told Fitzy, but we put a dude in JAIL, using photos on his myspace account as proof.
I'd delete him too. As far as FB, if I find I'm not enjoying being in contact with someone, they're voted off the island. Sorry, gone. I'm blonde, so I blame it on my ditziness if it ever comes up. "Um, I think my account exploded or something!?!?" I'm smart, but it works. I guess people expect blondes with boobs to be dumb, Master's candidate or not.
There have been MANY occasions where I was hurt/rejected/upset by an event that in the end was probably a very good thing. I.e. I left Savannah, GA as I started to date a really great guy, moved to GERMANY, he went to Iraq for the invasion, I deployed to Turkey and met Jay. I now own a home with Jay, but those first few months on a different continent not able to talk to your man SUCK.
The guy and I are still friends.
I wrote a book... I'm done.

Samantha said...

AMEN! I have had many moments were I had to put faith in the idea that everything happens for a reason and sometimes when something really upsetting has happened, that phrase has gotten me through just knowing the outcome was for my own good.

As for the dude you used to date - If his comments are constantly popping up on the new FB layout where you know everybody's business and you don't want to read it, I say un-friend the prick.